Pointers

The Intentional Grandfather

 You’ve Been Promoted!

Pastoral insights from Steve Stroope at HomePointe Church and from Pastor George Sasso, CCCH Marriage & Family Ministry

 Grandfathers hold a unique and exalted position when it comes to the process of spiritual formation in the next generation.  Other than mom and dad no one else carries the stature or inherent authority in the lives of children.  In fact, not even mom or dad can fill the role we fill.  That’s why I find it troubling that so many modern grandfathers squander their opportunity thinking “I’ve finished the parenting task.”  Hardly.

We are not called “grandparents” because we’ve been retired from the parenting process.  We are called “grand” because we’ve been promoted!  That means your task is to do everything possible to help your family achieve success in their most important assignment.  Regardless of what business you may be in, your “family business” includes a clear purpose.  Specifically, those blessed with the gift of grandchildren are called to inspire and nurture the faith of the next generation as life’s greatest privilege and priority.

The scriptures command moms, dads and grandparents to give the next generation a framework for living rooted in the knowledge of and relationship with God.  It is our job to support and reinforce the role of parents as they fulfill the command of Deuteronomy 6…

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.  Impress them on your children.  Talk about them when you sit at home, and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up… (vs. 6-8)       

It seems that this generation of grandfathers mentally check-out or skim past this vital passage of scripture because they assume it only applies to mom and dad.  When did that change?

Prior generations of grandparents understood this mandate to target them as the patriarchs of faith in their extended families.  We need to recapture that understanding today if we are going to fulfill our God-ordained role in the faith formation process.

How do you start?  Put in place regular scheduled times when you get to invest in your grandchildren such as:

  • Put a weekly “touching base” call or text message reminder on your planner to prompt “spontaneous” encouragement or conversation
  • Plan once-a-month, twice-a-month, or once-a-week sleepovers
  • Host a once-a-year entire week or more with grandchildren
  • Create Grandfather/Grandson, Grandmother/Granddaughter events or dates
  • Establish birthday traditions (like breakfasts with them)
  • Help grandchildren pick out and purchase Christmas gifts for their parents
  • Create a Fall Festival celebration each year
  • Observe annual celebration of their salvation
  • Establish Easter traditions

The key is creating recurring meaningful experiences that, once they have been instituted, take place fairly automatically.  Leverage the tools and resources we’ve suggested to make influencing the faith of the next generation easy.

GOING FURTHER – Resources

It should be noted that Calvary Chapel Chino Hills does not necessarily endorse any particular resource and the entirety of its content.

 Recommended Books:

Available from the CCCH Bookstore

Extreme Grandparenting by Tim Kimmel and Darcy Kimmel

Are you ready to take grandparenting to the next level?  This book offers timeless and tested principles for grandparenting in the twenty-first century.

Turnaround At Home by Jack and Lisa Hibbs

You will learn how the spiritual, emotional and social legacy combine to create a strong or weak heritage. You will also discover practical ideas for giving a strong heritage to the next generation.

Men of Influence by Bill Hendricks

Men have a way of rubbing off on one another—for better or worse. You will be influenced and you will influence, especially when you have regular one-on-one interactions with another man.

 GOING FURTHER – Church Support

 @Home Room – Free, easy ideas for faith conversations at mealtime, bedtime, family night, movie nights and more are available from the @Home Room or online at 162.144.50.117. Most of the ideas are designed for parents they can be easily adapted for use by grandparents.